Sometimes even mommies have a bad day

Sometimes even mommies have a bad day

by Rebecca Klempner

If you have ever read the book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day, you may remember the page. Alexander finally adjourns to bed at the end of his terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day. He sounds resigned, yet also comforted. Why? Because his mother has just informed him that “some days are just like that.”

How does she know? Because even mommies have bad days.

I do not profess to be a parenting expert (far from it…I still take parenting classes myself), but I am of the opinion that every mother needs to develop some coping skills to deal with your basic, run-of-the mill bad day. Because you will have some.

I’m not addressing the really scary stuff: health crises, mourning, financial woes, clinical depression, and the like. These are true ordeals that require serious problem-solving at the least and professional assistance at the most.

But what often distresses you is small stuff. You leave your purse at the store; the baby comes down sick when you have a meeting; your babysitter is late; you forget your mother-in-law’s birthday. You neglect to put yeast in your challah dough and don’t realize it ‘til noon Friday. You run out of clean underwear and the washing machine breaks down. Each one is a small trial. When more than one strikes, it’s enough to drive you to chocolate, or maybe a visit to Macy’s.

In general, you owe it to yourself and those around you to be positive. You’ll enjoy life better and people will enjoy being around you. Pull out the bubbles, legos, or coloring books and just enjoy your kids company. Pick up a pizza and picnic at the park with the kids. Remind yourself that some people pray that they will have a messy house full of disobedient kids and a husband who comes home late and has forgotten to pick up milk at the store (again).

However, a truly horrible, no-good very bad day does not always respond to reframing and the fake-it-‘til-you-make-it smile. And that is okay, because not every day will be bad. That’s why Alexander is comforted by his mom. She’s really saying, “We all have bad days, but most days are good. Wake up tomorrow, and it will be a good one.”

As many people know, King Solomon had a ring. It read “This too will pass.” When things were good, he glanced at it and didn’t get too light-headed, for he knew that life could get tough just around the bend. When things were bad, the ring reminded him that if he just held it together for a little while longer, the situation would improve.

The story of Alexander makes this lesson real for kids…and for us, too. But, you can’t just read it. If we internalize this message, and really live it, we can instill resilience in our children in the future so they bounce back after their bad days. If we role-model the right attitude when we break a few eggs, get a parking ticket, and tear our favorite jacket all in one day, that terrible day can lead to a whole lot of good ones.