Don't Forget to Kvetch!

by Deborah Grayson Riegel

My 7 year old daughter Sophie was devastated.

Her twin brother, Jacob, had just announced the name of the 6 year old girl he was going to marry, and Sophie was not happy with the decision.

"What if she's not a good aunt to my kids???" Sophie wailed.

"Is it possible that she may mature in time?" I asked, coachingly.

"But what if she doesn't, and she teaches my kids bad behaviors?" Sophie pressed.

"It's possible, but what if Jacob doesn't end up marrying her?" I tried.

"But what if he does???" Sophie demanded.

"Is it possible that you might feel differently about her in 20 years from now?" I ventured.

"I'LL WRITE MYSELF A NOTE!" Sophie proclaimed.

(Editor's note: I welcome your emails of emotional support - headcoach@myjewishcoach.com.)

Clearly, Sophie might have naturally moved past this, but she sure as heck wasn't going to let herself.

Which led me to think:

How many things are you frustrated, anxious or angry about that you might have been willing to forget, put aside or ignore, but you wrote yourself a mental note to NOT let it go?

Things like:
A disagreement with a co-worker
The "dream" job you almost got, but didn't
The "one that got away"

Yes, we tolerate, put up with, accept, take on, and are dragged down by people's behavior, situations, unmet needs, crossed boundaries, unfinished business, frustrations, problems, and even our own behavior.

Some of it is worth the battle -- but do you know which ones to keep in play and which ones to let go? And what is it costing you in time, energy and productivity to keep these "tolerations" active?

Click here to download 200+ Tolerations to decide for yourself what's worth kvetching about -- and what's worth moving past.